Happy New Years!

Happy New Year Everybody.

I didn’t send out Christmas cards this year, but I wanted to do a little year in review for 2008. Let me sum up the year in one word- BUSY! Did you catch that? Busy!

I started the year taking 2 classes at ACC while waiting to get accepted into the Physical therapist assistant program. While doing that I had 4 jobs- I “babysat” 15 hours a week for another ACC student who needed help remember to go to class and do homework. I babysat adorable infant twins in the Pflugerville Ward once a week for a couple hours for about a month to give the mom a break. I also rated English Proficiency Exams online for ACTFL from home. I also continued to teach Body Flow at Gold’s Gym twice a week. I guess I just didn’t know how to be normal and in the summer had 3 jobs. I kept Body Flow and ACTFL, dropped my babysitting jobs, and picked up working PRN (as needed) as an Administrative Assistant for my old job at Odyssey Hospice. It is a lot of fun to be able to pick and choose hours and be very flexible.

I was also busy being the Relief Society President (the women’s organization at church) till May. I was blessed with that calling for just over 2 years. It was a delight and I know I am the person I am today because of it. People asked me if I suddenly had all this time on my hands once I was done with that. Time? What time? I believe that when it comes to taking care of God’s business, He expands your time! He sure blessed me with all the capacity to do everything that needed to be done in ever aspect of my life. I did feel very ackward on Sunday having no meetings all day before 2:30 church. But I have since filled that time up again with my new calling. I am a ward missionary now. I have had the cool opportunity of teaching some recent converts new member lessons. Sometimes I think- why am I teaching them, I get so much more learning from these awesome sisters with new powerful testimonies! This new calling has stretched me, but if I learned anything being Relief Society President it is that when God gives you a job to do, it is possible to do it, so jump on in!

A not so fun part of 2008 has been back problems. In March I saw a chiropractor for low back pain. I finally stopped going in August when I was no better. In October I started seeing a physical therapist with some improvement. Then this month I started seeing a more specialized PT to try out some McKenzie techniques. Looks like I am having some problems with a disc that just doesn’t want to heal. It is a slow process, but at least today I think I am progressing. Enough about that, this back has taken more money and time away from me, it doesn’t need any more attention!

Fun stuff this year? Oh yeah, why not make my schedule more busy? I went to Utah 3 times this year. First I went in February for my cousin’s sealing to her husband in the Mt. Timp Temple. I returned again in July for a nice three week vacation. I spent time in Orem, St. George, drove up to Idaho to visit a friend, and then had my college roommate Christina Russell meet me and we temple hopped. We went to the Salt Lake, Jordan River, Mt. Timp, Provo, and Manti temples in 3 days. What a magnificent experience that was!

More fun? Early this year the New Kids on the Block announced they were releasing a new album and would be touring again. If you were a teenager in the late 80’s or early 90’s you understand the fad. I though okay, this could be fun if they come to Austin. Well, in August my friend Gina Russell and her sister Christine asked if I wanted to go to the concert in San Antonio in October. I thought, sure why not? Well let me tell you, I left San Antonio feeling like a teenager again, I caught the NKOTB bug and am a fan once again. Put your feelings aside about boy bands and I think most would agree they were awesome entertainers. I had a big break between tests in November, so I planned another Utah trip around concert #2 in Salt Lake City. I had just as much fun, maybe even more. I screamed my head off the whole time. This time I was alone, but not really because I became “friends” with the girls on my row. Even better, I got seats near the revolving stage that they appear on in the middle of the concert. PLUS, we got moved even closer when they sang on it. I was literally 3 feet from them. Good times!

I got accepted to the PTA program and rocked my first semester, and didn’t cry until the middle of the semester.

I sang in the Institute talent show with my dad.

I joined the world of blogging and facebook.

I got more in to the Heisman nominations and college football scene than ever before. Gooooo Colt McCoy and Hook’em horns!

I feel for guys, and got my heart broken by guys, and picked myself back up again…

I ran 4 miles straight for the first time ever!

I have the bathroom all to myself now that my brothers are at school.

I’d say it was a year of firsts, and a my theme seemed to be- Bring it! Bring it in school, bring it in my callings, and bring it in my personal life. I told a friend the other day that it is hard being single. But you know what? Life is hard in general and I refuse to let my marital status define me. I expect 2009 to be just as BUSY, that is how I run these days. I hope my theme can be- “Go and do. Come what may and love it!” I hope however that I am never too busy to spend time with the ones I love. I can always make time for that.

I hope 2009 brings you all joy, delightful moments, growth, and love. And may you take life by the horns and say- BRING IT!

Treasures in the Attic

Treasures in the Attic!

Yesterday we were trying to decide what to do in the afternoon. Devin, Michael, and I were getting nowhere picking a movie. Luckily dad came up with the brilliant idea to go in the attic, take everything out, and rearrange it. It actually turned out to be a fun activity.

Devin and Michael did all the heavy lifting while I opened up my 4 jumbo rubbermaid containers of treasures. I saw all my old barbies, my super cool 3 foot Barbie bus, Cabbage Patch Kids, Tea Sets, High School Mums, Middle School pep squad uniform, and old New Kids on the Block posters and flags.




The best item was an old ugly wig that my dad got in Brazil for me to play dress up in when I was a kid. I put that on with a wild moo-moo and don't I look stylish
















...and then I found another priceless piece of history- The Gossip Books! The gossip books were started in middle school. My friends Nadia and Natasha and I didn't just pass notes. We kept notebooks to write to each other. That way it didn't look like were passed notes. We thought we were real sneeky! They first one dates back to 1993 and the last ones end in high school somewhere. I hung out with the two of them last night and we had a lot of fun reading from them. Teenage girls can be so dramatic!

Always fun at the Kelm house...

The 2008 Heisman Trophy Winner...here is what it comes down to folks...who is the best looking? That is right, if you know me, you know I am sucker for nice arms. That means I like a perfect blend of biceps brachii, and anterior/middle/posterior deltoids. (I can even tell you where the muscles originate and insert on the bones.) Quarterbacks and recievers happen to have the best arms in my opinion. To top it all off, add a handsome face, and you fine looking man. So take your pick from this years Heisman finalists....Colt McCoy, Tim Tebow, and who is that other guy? ...oh yeah sam bradford.

Light In My Vessel

“Light In My Vessel”
By Tamara Kelm

As a young single sister, I have learned the importance of seeking for more light in my life. Light is equal to hope, and what sister getting older in a singles ward can’t use a bit more hope? For anyone, life is full of ups and downs. My goal this year has been to make the ups raise me up higher than the downs ever bring me down. This way I am always in constant motion upward, even when life is tough. Several months ago I sat in a leadership meeting and a sister, and dear friend of mine, shared her experience of finding joy in life because she was filled with light. I asked myself, is what I am missing? Can I have more light in my life? It has been a blessing to learn how to bring more light in my life so I can bare the downs with more hope and faith in my Savior.

There are three ways I have learned to bring more light in my life. The first is simply to ask Heavenly Father for more light. One day I was studying Ether chapter 2. I was feeling like “mountain waves” were dashing around me and life was rocky. Like the Brother of Jared and the 16 stones used to light up the dark vessels on his journey, sometimes we need to present things to the Lord and ask Him to enlighten them. He said, “…therefore touch these stones, O Lord, with thy finger, and prepare them that they may shine forth in darkness” (Ether 3:4). After reading this, I wrote down sixteen stones of my own and carried them to the Lord in prayer and asked him to touch them. These stones were talents to develop, service I could give more faithfully in my calling, and changes I could make in my daily routine. Sooner than I had expected, I began to see one by one that each stone was slowly shining brighter and bringing more light into my life. I believe that bringing offerings such as these shows the Lord that we are willing to put effort into changing our lives. The Lord manifested himself unto the Brother of Jared because of his faith. Likewise, when we ask the Lord to make us shine, we can see the Savior’s power manifested unto us and touch us in very personal ways. “Every soul who forsaketh his sins and cometh unto me, and calleth on my name, and obeyeth my voice, and keepeth my commandments, shall see my face and know that I am; and that I am the true light that lighteth every man” (D&C 93:1).

Second, to have more light we need to bare one another’s burdens. When we “come unto the fold of God”, we covenant to “bear one another’s burdens”, “mourn with those that mourn”, and “comfort those that stand in need of comfort” (Mosiah 18:8-9). In the October 2007 General Conference, Bishop Richard C. Edgley said, “All are there to administer comfort and show compassion in times of need…What happens to one, happens to all. We endure together”. Our relationship with the Savior should be our first refuge in times of trial. However sometimes we need to share our burdens with other saints, as they need to share their burdens with us. This means we need to call our visiting teachers when we are having a bad day and not wait for them to turn into mind readers. It also means need to be willing to spring into action when we find out a sister we visit teach is in need. Sometimes all we can do is offer a prayer, be a listening ear, or let them use our shoulder to wipe their tears on. When we show compassion we become more like Christ and invite others to come unto Him. Compassion adds light to our vessels.

Finally, unselfish service brings a light into our souls. How often are we counseled to go serve when we are feeling down? This is an important principle, however there is an even great purpose in serving. When we serve unselfishly, with the recipient’s needs uppermost in our minds, we show true charity. Charity will bring us unimaginable light. I learned this lesson from my friend Ellen.* It had been a hard year and she was experiencing some serious health issues. I had tried to be aware of my dear friends needs and had been leaving treats in her bag on Sundays. On this particular Sunday the thought popped into my head that I needed to do something for her that day. I thought, are you kidding me, again? I feared she would be getting tired of me by now. However, I followed the Spirit and before I went to church I grabbed a box and filled it with her favorite chocolate Easter candy. Church started and Ellen came in late and sat beside me. From her body language I could tell she was not her normal self. Something was wrong. I let her keep to herself for half of the meeting. When we started singing the rest hymn I leaned over to her and said, “you look like it has already been a long day, are you alright?” She told me she was having a migraine and it had been a rough morning. I had planned on sneaking the candy into her bag sometime that day, but desperate times call for desperate measures! I reached in my bag and gave her the chocolate. Instantly her demeanor changed. She relaxed and she seemed immediately happier, like a burden had been lifted. Ellen couldn’t resist and opened the candy. She would pop a chocolate in her mouth, pat the box, and then pat my leg. She did this every time she popped more in her mouth- pat the box and then pat my leg. She leaned over and said, “I don’t know which I love more?” After sacrament meeting we started to go our separate ways. Then she stopped and gave me a big hug. It took me by surprise. She squeezed me hard and whispered in my ear, “you were just what I needed today, thank you”. I immediately felt joy swell in my heart.

In serving, we are guided more fully by the Spirit when we take ourselves out of the equation. The chocolate was soley about Ellen. Unselfish serving is true charity, and charity is the pure love of Christ. The light that unselfish service brings warms the soul and burns bright. It teaches us to be more Christ-like and allows us to feel love and to give love.

We can find more light by asking the Lord to make brighter things already surrounding us, by bearing other’s burdens, and by serving unselfishly. Paul taught, “For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ…We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed” (2 Corinthians 4:6, 8-9). The Savior Jesus Christ lives, and because he lives we can be filled with light, have hope, and be not troubled. You can have light in your vessel to hold you up when life’s “mountain waves shall dash upon you” (Ether 2:24). With Him as my guiding light, I have nothing to fear.

Dates

I have always enjoyed going on dates with fun guys. They are few and far in-between. However, recently I discovered the joy of eating yummy dates- as in the fruit that tastes like candy. For years my mom and dad have bought dates and raved over them. I somehow decided without tasting that I didn't like them. Well, I repented of my ways 2 months ago. I went to the Ramadan dinner at the Muslim center. When closing the fast, they eat dates. I broke down and ate one, than another, and probably a couple more. Oh my goodness, what was I thinking? Not to like dates? Crazy talk!

Mom has had a container of dates by her bed the past 2 weeks. I have asked before eating them. Today however, I see a new container of dates sitting on the kitchen counter- in a "public" place now. Are they fair game? I assumed so and I have eaten 2 while listing to OPIc tests. I think I need to leave the kitchen now and work elsewhere.

What a nice indulgence during this crazy week of exams and tests to rate! Thanks mom!

Homecoming Queen!

Homecoming Queen...how knew you could be homecoming queen at age 28? Well tonight at a Tri-Stake Young Single Adult dance our theme was Homecoming. We also had a football tournament this afternoon. I decided to show up like I was already the winner. I wore my old bridesmaid dress, sparkly jewlery from Pakistan, cheesy white gloves, and a plastic Tiara. I asked everyone to vote for me and I won. It was so much fun. I got to choose a slow song I wanted and who to dance with. I asked Kevin Christensen because he was the most handsome guy there in a suit and I needed to look good. We danced to Michael Buble's "The way you look tonight". Sadly there were hardly any other guys there from my ward. I still had fun hanging out with the other girls.

I always knew I was royalty, just wish my lost Prince Charming would hurry up and get here!!!

Super Awesome Trip!

For many reasons, I decided to take a trip to Utah this past weekend. I flew in on Thursday night and stayed with Beth. I had a lovely time chatting with her, getting my butt kicked in a video game, eating yummy chocolate chip Krusteaz pancakes made by her great husband Brian, and getting playing with 13 month old Clark. Clark is adorable! His new thing is to scowl at people, something I was not exception to. I did get some smiles out of him in the end.

Beth drove me down to Orem on Friday about lunchtime. I then got to hang out with my brother Devin and grandparents. We are a pretty casual group, quite content to sit and chat. Devin is looking good and seems very happy. (Except for on Saturday when his laptop stopped recognizing his operating system and he will now be without a computer for 2 weeks as it gets sent in to be fixed.)

Friday night was the first home BYU basketball game of the season. Grandpa took Devin and I out to dinner at Golden Corral. He sure does love that place. Grandpa got extra tickets and Devin, Paula Prince, and I enjoyed the game together. They played Long Beach State University and won. Devin’s favorite player Lee Cummard scored 36 points! It was a tight first half, but BYU kept a lead most of the second half. I sure do love singing the Cougar Fight song!

On my way back from visiting my grandparents during half time I ran in to an old friend from my BYU ward 6 years ago. Ryan Serr was sitting about 5 rows behind Grandma. I haven’t seen him in years. I went to a girl’s preference dance with him my Junior year and had a small crush on him at one point. It was fun to catch up with him. He came down from Salt Lake for the game. We are now friends on facebook. (Got to love facebook sometimes!)

Saturday was another sports themed day. I got to watch the UT vs. Kansas State game on TV in the morning and then the BYU vs. Air Force game at 1:30. Both teams won, by teams I guess I mean MY teams! Wahoo! BYU’s game was a bit scary in the first half, but then they came out and showed Air Force who is boss. I have really enjoyed watching football this season. I admit (and don’t tell Grandpa Hutchison), but I think I might bleed a little more burnt orange than blue when it comes to football. I got a lot more excited watching Colt McCoy, Jordan Shipley, and Quan Cosby than I did watching Max Hall and Austin Collie. I think my dad would be proud.

Saturday was the New Kids on the Block concert in Salt Lake City. Yes, I went by myself and didn’t tell a lot of people what I was doing, but I am happy to report right now that I had a fabulous time and I don’t regret it one bit. Good times, good memories. So I started typing this at the airport. I stopped because I saw 2 girls with NKOTB shirts on and had to go talk to them. We exchanged pictures and had fun talking for 20 minutes. They both had childhood friends here came out to SLC just for the concert. I love how this trip down memory lane brought me out of my shell with random strangers. Somehow I will return to the real world.

So I figure my blog is about me and even though this is already ridiculously long, I have a story that is not finished yet to write about. On Thursday on my flight from Denver to Salt Lake a really cute guy sat in front of me and he had an OU hat on. I started talking to him, told him I thought it was dangerous to sit a Longhorn and Sooner near each other. He said he thought we could get along. We chatted just a bit before take off and when we landed. He is from Dallas and had business in Grand Junction but stopped to visit family in Utah. He does investing and is also a UTAH fan. Guess he really bleeds red. Well I thought about him all weekend. I am on my flight now back to Denver and who is 10 rows in front of me in a red OU hat? Mr. OU! I am going to be daring. I am wrote a quick note saying hello and giving him my email address and I am going to ask the flight attendant to give it to him. That is the kind of mood I am in…stay tuned.

Enjoy the pics, I sure enjoyed taking them all. Let me end with a funny story. One of the best conversations I had this weekend though was with Grandpa Hutchison. We were watching BYU play and he said he hopes that in Heaven we get to play football. He wants to be a quarterback and he wants Devin to be his tight end. He also wants Jordan and Tyler to be his receivers and Justin to play on defense. Devin and I laughed so hard, it was a delightful moment.

Goodnight,

Tamara

Part II

I'll do this in a couple posts. I confess, I did it...I went to another NKOTB concert while I was in Utah this weekend. I figure I am young and single, and can do these random crazy things. This time it was even better. Well, obvsiously the anticipation of what would come next was unique the first concert. This one was fun because I was on the floor and then they moved to the revolving stage in the middle half way threw, they moved us over closer to that stage. Literally, I was 6 feet from the stage. I could see their facial expressions and it was fabulous! I sat by 4 strangers and asked if I could be their friends for the night. They were happy to be my new best friends. I gave the scoop on what to expect and they were excited too. This time I brought my camera. I used up all the memory, mostly on videos, so if you care to listen...enjoy!

This one is Jordan singing "My Favorite Girl".




And more....
Now the revolving stage- "2 in the Morning".



And more...can you tell I was a bit excited?

"Tonight".

Hook'em Horns!!!!

Everybody knows that football is big in Texas. Even Elder Packer was fully aware of that this weekend. Because I am nice and spoiled, I got my dad's ticket this weekend while was out of town and went to my 3rd University of Texas Football game of the season. This game was time for UT to bounce back from a heart-wrenching defeat by Texas Tech the week before. Happily, we won 45-21! I am on the bandwagon for Colt McCoy to be the Heisman winner. I mean have you looked at his arms? I love some nice anterior and middle delts, and biceps! Those arms are what I call some good dancing arms- my hand would fit perfectly on his arm for a slow dance. As mom and I were talking out of the stadium the walkway goes under the tunnel the players cross to return to the locker room. We stood there watching them leave and I was eagerly waiting to see Colt. Then the mean event staff lady with the ugly neon shirt told us we were blocking traffic and had to move. How dare she, I know Colt was just around the corner. Sadly we listened and moved on, but as I walked I thought I could have politely told her I would move in just a minute and stood my ground. Oh well...



Back to football...I had a great time! Mom and dad have seats on the 50 yard line, 45 rows up. Not much in life can be perfect, but those seats sure are.

Enjoy the pics and HOOK'EM HORNS!!!!! And remember, the EYES OF TEXAS ARE UPON YOU!

In the meantime? No! I'm not waiting, I am becoming!

This semester has been one of the busiest times in my life. I am amazed to think I can keep going at the speed life is racing. I work 3-4 hours a day, go to school, teach Body Flow at Golds Gym, have been learning new stuff to teach, sub other classes, meet friends for lunches or dinners, attend institute, and try to serve my family, friends, at church, and those around me.

Here is an example of one of my days last week...Thursday: 7am-9:30am- Work, 10:00-11:30- New Testament Class, 11:45-12:30 Walk around Lady Bird Lake, 12:30-1:00 buy new walking shoes, 1:00-2:45 Anatomy Lab, 3:00-4:00 Donate Blood, and 4:45-7:00 High School Musical 3 movie with Angel. Run, run, run, run, run...

I started to worry this past weekend that maybe my lack of motivation in the dating department is because I am too busy doing other things. Did I subconsciously decide that I want to put a career in front of family? I put a lot of serious thought in to this all day Sunday, then Sunday night while talking to a good friend, I realized that is just not true. It is not my job to chase men. However it is also not my job to simply wait around or tread water while hoping that my next phase of life will come. I don't have time to wait! I have thought I was ready to get married since I was headed off to BYU at 18! I am slowly realizing that although I am sure I have the maturity and abilities to be in a successful marriage, I am being blessed with opportunities that are preparing me for whatever lies ahead in my life. Even living in a house with other people, being single and 28 can be lonely, but I am surrounded with friends who are full of faith, hope, vision, and happiness, so I just have no room for the other stuff that happens to weigh me down.

My friend shared with me an awesome quote from the October Ensign.

"In looking forward to marriage, do not assume a wait-and-see posture. This is not just a period for making time or treading water. Seek to become a happy, productive person in your own right. If you have been unsuccessful in love or hurt or betrayed or ignored, break away from complaining and self-pity. Fill your life with all the things that will improve the head, the heart, and the hand."

Some other counsel in this article is to be happy, develop friendships, create order in your life, serve, maintain moral purity, and attend the temple. And I would add, allow all this to help you be more Christ-like.

So I step forward into this week with new encouragement. My life right now is not something to do in the meantime. I am not "waiting", I am preparing and "becoming".

"Come what may and LOVE it", and "Bloom Where You Are Planted"!!!!!

TPTA Student Conclave

If you haven't caught on, I am a PTA student...no, not a student of the Parent/Teacher Association. I am a Student Physical Therapist Assistant. This weekend I went to Lubbock, Texas for a 2 day Texas Physical Therapy Association Student Conclave. My school paid for the registration, and my PTA club paid for the hotel. I just had to get myself there. Lubbock is an hour flight to the northeast (or a dreadful 6 hour car drive which I opted out of). About 16 of us from my school flew together, including 3 teachers. It was my first time to stay in a hotel room with people I don't know outside of a class. That was an adventure in itself. I swear that bed I had to share wasn't even a queen. Oh well, 2 nights of intermitent sleep because of worrying I'd fall off or brush in to the other girl doesn't mean much on the grand scale of things.

The first day we arrived we went to the exhibit hall. This hall was full of vendors and reps from all sorts of companies in my field. They had every kind of freebie you could imagine, from chapstick to pens, and stress balls to first aid kits. Every table had handfuls of candy to load up on you. This exhibit will be much more useful for me next year when I am on the verge of job hunting. It opened my eyes to just how many options and roads there are in this field. One thing that peaked my interest was doing physical therapy for a children's home health agency. The rep was really friendly and will be in Austin a couple weeks and I can probably meet with him when he is here. If I can get my spanish up to par, I could open up my possibilites in the job market even more with great monetary incentives!

Friday night was the Student Assembly. We nominated and voted on a new student leadership board and had a keynote speaker telling us why PT's are wonderful. It was actually facinating to watch.

Saturday was a day of workshops. I went to one on EKG's, Wound Care, and Traumatic Brain Injuries. The Wound Care one was the most fascinating. I saw pictures of gaping holes in people, and the word "wound" just doesn't seem big enough of a description. I was shocked! They had some before and after pictures, it is a miracle that the body can restore some of the damage that we inflict on it. I am sure it will be very different when I see these kinds of wounds in person, but as far as seeing pictures goes, I can handle it fine. A classmate had to leave the lecture because it was making her sick. I learned that in the healing process, scabs are bad. Scabs keep the new skin from forming underneth and getting better quicker. So you know the advice of don't pick it off and let sores dry out? BAD! Wounds should stay clean and moist (but not wet)- covered and moist with something like Neosporan.

I won a drawing from an exhibit. Lucky lucky me, I got a basket full of wine, wine glasses, and bottle openers. Great, the one person on the trip who doesn't drink got the prize with alcohol. I decided it was silly to figure out how to bring it home on the plane and then figure out what to do with it, so I returned it. I took it back to the booth and said thanks, but I don't drink, so why don't you draw another name. They said- "This is a first". My classamates thought I was nuts, and I hoped it would spur a gospel discussion, but nobody really inquired why I don't drink. Guess I need to be a bit more proactive if I want to have gospel discussion. I'm such a chicken!

That night was the reception dinner. One of my teachers got the PTA Teacher of the Year award. He really is a great teacher. It was fun to cheer him on.

In addition to the scholastic stuff, I managed to run twice at they gym, study for an hour, rate 25 tests, and watch the UT football game. I proudly wore my UT sweatshirt in Texas Tech Red Raider land. Nobody tried to jump me, but I had no fear. I had some people tell me I was brave, I took it as a compliment!

We flew back on Sunday morning. I was SO excited last night to have my very own bed all to myself! I didn't have to turn over like flipping a pancake- flip, flip, flip...

I learned something about myself on this. I learned that although I can be a bit superficial sometimes and have felt a bit obessive about still being excited about my concert earlier this month, the one thing I am not is a woman of the world. I was shocked to find that people I respect in the classroom get out into the world, a filter falls out of their mouths and some became people I didn't really want to be around. I couldn't believe the language some used and the way they complained about the conference and hotel that was pretty much free. I was very disappointed with them, but at the same time, I am grateful that my ears were offended by it. Does that make sense? I would hope that my Spirit would be sensitive to the crassness of the world. I am glad that it is.

One to another busy week...

Step By Step, Oooo baby, gonna get to you girl!

When I was 9 my dad took me to a New Kids On The Block concert in Austin, TX. Five years later the group broke up. Almost 15 years after that, they have reunited and are touring again. I wasn't crushed and I haven't obsessed, but I admit I was very excited when earlier this year they announced a new CD and tour. They were on the Today Show and weren't very good, so I didn't hold high expectations, but no way was I going to miss a concert if it came to town. Then Gina and Chrissy Russell emailed me and asked if I wanted to go to a concert with them in San Antonio. Heck ya! This week as the days got closer to Friday, I started to get more and more excited. Isn't it every girls dream to see the band she loved reunited again? I dug up my old cassettes. Yes- I said cassettes! Luckily my car still has a cassette player. I popped "Step By Step" in on Thursday. I was surprised that I remembered all the words. Then I started looking up stuff on the Internet. YouTube has been my best friend. They have two music videos of new stuff, and they looked real good! I watched interviews and looked at the NKOTB TV on their website with clips the guys film themselves backstage before concerts. By Thursday night I felt like a little kid on Christmas Eve.

Gina and Chrissy arrived on Friday about 3:30pm. I haven't really hung out with either of them since I was in middle school, but it sure was easy to take our trip down memory lane and play the tapes in the car. We stopped to get dinner and arrived at the stadium about 7:00.

The opening act for the opening act was aweful. She was Jamaican and looked like a woman still trying to wear a tu-tu she had when she was 5. I am glad she left after 3 songs. Then Natasha Bedingfield came out for about 30 minutes. She was good.

While we were waiting for the real show to start, they had a screen that you could text a message to enter a contest and see your message on the screen. That was fun. There were some pretty obsessed people there. Comments like- "I named my first child after Jordan", "Danny, I want to kiss your muscles", "Donnie, I am single and so are you", "Joe and I locked eyes in Vegas and it was amazing". That was very entertaining to watch.

Then the show began...13,000+ screaming woman...lots of lights and smoke when the came guys were lifted up from behind the stage. They started by singing "Boyfriend" from their new CD "Block". Oooooo, the looked good. "If you're single, single, you don't gotta be alone tonight...for the next couple minutes, girl I'ma be your boyfriend". They as soon as that was over the immediately transistioned in to an old song- "Favorite Girl". This song Jordan hits some very high notes. I didn't think he would be able to do it. I was wrong. They went on for quite awhile singing old songs and looking great. The sure do dance a lot and looked great doing it.

In the middle they somehow appeared on a revolving circular stage on the stadium floor and sang 2 new songs and and an old one with a piano. The old song was "Tonight", Gina's favorite. At the end of that they ran through the crowd back to stage and when they got back on the stage they brought a fan with them. Then they went back and forth,most old mixed occasionally with new. Joe got to do a couple solos on stage, Jordan did some solos, and Donnie did a solo. I don't really like him. Danny did a break dancing solo. Jon was just sang and dance in the back. He looks a bit out of place, but still easy on the eyes. I watched an interview of him on Oprah talking about severe panic attack. (He even had one right there with Oprah then consoling him.)

They sang "You got the right stuff", "Please don't go girl", Hangin' Tough, Summertime, Baby I believe in you, Step By Step, and on and on... One of the highlights was Jordan's solo of "Baby I believe in you". Jordan stood on the stage with his six-pack revealed as his unbuttoned shirt blew in the wind, he sang- "I'm so in love girl, with you, you, you, all of you." I turned to Gina and said- I can die now! If anybody knows, a certain individual I went to my first New Kids on the Block Concert with yelled out this same thing and I was mortified! But this time, I know he was singing to me. Okay, so me and thousands of other 25+ year old women.

Two hours of fun. Two hour of being swooned by the guys. Two hours of screaming, waving my hands side to side, singing along. Two hours of looking at Joe and Jordan through binoculars thinking they look so hot and wondering what their wives think of all this. Two hours of enjoying it all. It definitely exceeded my expectations.

I would do it all over again, and if they come back around, I'd go again. Fun times.

Now I must go back to the real world....or maybe I'll let myself dream for a couple more days...

It feels so good to be stiff!

It feels so good to be stiff.

I have been seeing a Physical Therapist for a week now. When I do the prescribed exercises, my back sure does feel much better. I am suppose to do 10 push up extension every hour, approx. 10 times a day. During the week it isn't hard , but when I was running around all weekend it didn't work out so well. I feel much better when I do the extensions, so I know it is working and need to keep it up and be consistent. I also have a half dozen exercises to do and get a 15 minute myofascial release massage at the PT office. It has been so very cool to have a PT and PTA to ask a million questions to and get the "inside scoop"on this cool field I am going in to. I know I am a geek because being a patient has been fun.

I went back to Body Pump for the first time in 5 weeks yesterday. I took it light and listened to the doctor by not doing didn't the "dead rows". I bend backwards and stretched in between every track. I didn't overdo it and my back felt fine when I was done. Today I am so stiff. My legs were shaking yesterday after lunges, so I knew this was coming. It is a good stiff though. It is the kind of pain that says- hey, you did something good, keep it up. As opposed to the pain that says- you dummy, stop! I've had too much of the latter lately, it is so nice to have the good kind of stiffness. I am glad to know that even though every muscle in my body is tender today, I didn't loose all my muscle mass (I know, silly fear in just 5 weeks). Wahoo! Thunder and lightening are still there!

This back stuff isn't over yet, but I do see a light at the end of the tunnel. Slow and steady...I just need to keep it slow and steady!

To a sorrowful soul...

This post is dedicated to a friend who has just lost her mother. The ache of her whole soul, I cannot imagine. The pain she feels can be soothed by the touch of the Master, but will never be fully gone in this earthly life. So what comfort could I possibly offer? I am going to give it a try, but I am relying heavily upon the words of Elder Jeffery R. Holland. I can't find this talk yet online, but it was given at the CES fireside of September 2008.

During conference today we looked up the meaning to the word "vicissitude". It means- "a change, especially a complete change, of condition or circumstances, as of fortune". My friend is experiencing a vicissitude of life right now. Her life has changed forever. Elder Holland taught that some hardships have to happen. He reminded us of just how hopeless life would be with these hardships were it not for the atonement of Jesus Christ. Then, he taught about one of the great lessons that comes from the prophet Joseph Smith's time in Liberty Jail. He compared Liberty Jail to a "prison temple". Prison temple? Can the two words possibly be put side by side? Could anything sacred and holy possibly have occurred in such a horrific atmosphere? Yes! Sections 121-123 of the "Doctrine and Covenants" show us beauty and majesty of comforting words, and the merciful manifestation of God's loving response. Elder Holland said that you can have sacred, revelatory experiences even in the most horrific of circumstances. "Man's extremity is God's opportunity."

The last verse of section 123 says- "...cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed". Sometimes in times of trial when we are stretched to what we think is beyond our capacity to bare, all we can do is stand still and wait to see His arm to be revealed.

My friend would probably rather not have this "opportunity" to learn from God, and can't imagine doing anything cheerful right now. But, I know that above all else, no matter what condition our hearts might be in (broken or whole), God will give us his reassuring love unceasingly...and we will feel it more easily if we will stand still and wait to see His arm to be revealed.

Much love and hugs my friend....

Trying something new...

Well I did it. I swallowed my pride and went to a doctor yesterday. Not just any doctor, a spine specialist. Dr. Yaniv gave me some good one-on-one time and for the next three weeks I am going to try physical therapy. I will start on Tuesday. Dr. Yaniv thinks that it is discal (sp?), but because I don't have a lot of nerve pain, she doesn't think it is ruptured, just bulging. I am going to the chiropractor today to pick up my x-rays. I was feeling kind of guilty about just quitting my adjustments, but then I thought- hey, I don't need to feel bad that they didn't fix me. Doesn't mean I am a bad patient, and it doesn't mean they are bad doctors. Chiropractic adjustments just aren't going to fix this particular problem. I have to admit I am pretty excited to get physical therapy, it is going to be fun to be able to learn some real life clinical stuff!

Ramadan Iftar

Allah hu akbar!

Last night I attended my first Ramadan Iftar. Ramadan is the month when Muslim's fast from dawn to dusk. An Iftar is the meal to break the fast at sunset. We listened to a presentation on the basics of the Muslim religion. Then the call to prayer was made and water and dates were passed out to break the fast. (Okay mom, I admit, dates are pretty good) We then watched them pray. I had never witnessed a Muslim pray and I was truely touched. It was very moving. We then had a very yummy dinner. Samosas and naan anyone?

I got to wear my pakistani outfit that normally just hangs in my closet. I love getting dressed up.

The prayers that are prayed 5 times a day are called Salah. Salah comes from a verb that means "to connect". I like that view of prayer, it really should be my connection with God.

When the speaker gave his presentation, it was easy to notice that every time he mentioned a prophet like Muhammad or Abraham, or Jesus, he respectfully followed it with something like "Peace be upon him" or "May Allah bless him".

I also have my own copy of the Qur'an. (Nadia and Natasha- I respectfully put it on my shelf, not on the floor like many of my books.)

Kudafis!

Ken Lee, Tulibu Dibu Douchoo

Today was the first day I had fun in my Intro to PT class. We learned about wheelchairs and how to transport patients in them. Half us were "drivers" and the other half were "wheel-chair users" (w/c bound is not politically correct). I was a patient first. My partner wheeled me into (or is it onto?) the elevator and then outside. We took turns learning how to use the tipper to roll down a ramp, how to properly roll up a ramp, how to roll off a curb, and how to go in and out of doors. The funniest part was watching people come down the ramp. The look on people's faces as they were tipped backwards and wondering if their partner would drop them was priceless. Lots of fear! I think secretly it was an attempt to trick us in to team building trust exercises. You know, do you trust your friend to catch you as you fall backwards? Good times!

I took my first exam in my Functional Anatomy class. It wasn't so bad. I'll find out the truth on Wednesday. When my professor passed out the exam I told him- "BRING IT!" I think I am setting the pattern like I did in Anatomy- finishing the test first. I am just a fast test taker I guess. I try not to give myself too much time to second guess myself. There is a girl in my class with testing anxiety. I brought my laptop to play some soft music, and I talked her through some of the relaxation/meditation that I use in Body Flow. We found a quiet room and spend 8 minutes doing that before the test. I hope it helped. She seemed calmer.

During a break later in the afternoon we were all entirely too serious and quiet, so I pulled out my laptop and shared some clips on You Tube. There is a hilarious video of a Bulgarian girl singing what she thinks is English words to Mariah Carey's "Without You". She has no idea what the real words are. For example, the line "I can't live, if living is without you". What does the Bulgarian "speaking English" say? "Ken lee, tulibu dibu douchoo". At the end the judges (this was the Bulgarian version of American Idol) ask her what language that was. Her reply? "English." Dad and I watched this clip this past weekend and laughed so hard. If you need a good laugh, go to youtube.com and type in Ken Lee. Or, ask me and I'll belt out her version of this song myself! And if that is not enough, you can also look at another clip called "El Principe Gitano, In the Ghetto".

Don't forget to laugh and smile this week!

Hard thing to do

Yesterday I didn't mention my back at all. I have been having pain for about 8 months now in my lower back. I've been seeing a chiropractor for 5 of those 8 months. I thought that was the answer- x-rays showed my neck was off, slight curve in my lower back, and hips off. Well, all that is much straighter, my alignments are holding, and my strength is up. Good news right? Well, the pain hasn't changed, and in fact is has gotten worse. It almost feels like more stiffness than pain. For those who know medical terms, it is at my L5 and my illiosacral joint is getting adjusted. One theory is that I possible strained a ligament, meaning I over stretched. It hurts the most when I go from sitting to standing, and standing to sitting. If I don't have support behind my back when I sit, I really have a hard time standing. I have rotated my mattress, taken off my mattress pillow topper, and I'm taking a multi-vitamin and omega 3 supplements and drinking anti-oxidant Acai juice. Some hamstring, IT-band, piriformis, and hip opener stretches seem to help for a moment or two. It seems as if I am stiff when I work out, but even stiffer when I don't, so I've continued to work out as much as I want to. Well, that lead to the "hard thing to do"...I'm going to tone it way down. I am banning myself from my weight class for a month and limit my cardio to light walking or elipitcal to get my blood flowing. In my Yoga class I teach I am going to take the lower options. I'm also going to talk to a P.T friend next week and see if she has any more suggestions or if I need to give in and take this to a doctor. My stubborn exercise obsessive head has been winning this ridiculous battle for months, time to listen to my body and slow down so it can heal. There will be time to be fit when my body is not in pain. On a spiritual note, patience is all that comes to mind when I've prayed about this. Kind of like I've been getting the answer- "you know what to do", all along. I'm posting this story so that maybe I will hold myself accountable to this decision. Surely I can turn the will power to run 50 minutes in to will power to take it easy. Wish me luck!

A Week of Firsts

This week has been week of many firsts. My first week of physical therapy school, seeing my first cadaver dissection, first time not crying during the first week of school,my first Chick-fil-a hand mixed shake purchased by my loving brother, my first time to win Peanuts, the first time falling off of the treadmill, and the first time since I was 4 that I am now the only child at home.

Some things are worth mentioning a bit more...

First week of school! I have never actually been excited to start school. I was so excited, I think I was actually a bit disappointed with the first day. You know, all the boring stuff like syllabus and grading procedures...I did see a video with a real cadaver dissection. Let me just say eeeuuu, yuck! A german with a black hat, round rimmed hat, and round glasses cut up a male body hung up by its head. (I swear he was the guy in Indian Jones searching for the lost arch who melts in the end.) First he skinned the body, and then he cut our the vertebral column to pull out the spinal cord from the neck, all the way down to the toe. Freaky! I think the thing I enjoyed the most was going over anatomical landmarks in my functional anatomy lab. See, I hated physiology because I couldn't see proton pumps and calcium flooding into muscles at the neuromuscular junction. (see what I mean- boring!) However with Anatomy you say- find your iliac crest on your pelvis- and that, I can feel and see on myself. There are enough areas of life where you have to go on faith. I like having a little part where seeing is believing. My semester is going to be a lot of work, but I think I'll have enough time to get good studying in and do just fine.

Trivial things...last week I reached a new height in my physical fitness. I ran for 4.5 miles, in 50 minutes. I did it twice last week. Today I did it again. It feels very good to know I have the endurance and will power to push myself. It hasn't been with out blood, sweat, and almost tears. Last week I got home from a run and dad asked why my shirt was bloody. Huh? Sure enough, my sports bra strap rubbed me raw and I bled clear through to my shirt without knowing. (I bet the people at blockbuster must have thought I was crazy.) Then today I stepped off the treadmill to see if the TV screen on another one was working. When I got back on I mis-stepped and got thrown to the ground. I wanted to cry, my arm hurt, scraped my side, and stubbed my toe...however, I got up, shook it off, and continued to run.

The boys left today. We are all praying the beloved red car makes the trip to Utah. Kind of strange to know it will be just my and the parents now. Not sure what that will mean, but it will be fun to see how dynamics of the home change or don't change.

Back to the world of studying. Bring on more firsts!

Endurance vs. Patience

I had a delightful discussion with a coworker about James 1:4. The King James version uses the word "Patience" and the NIV Bible uses persevere or endure. I love that verse, but patience has more meaning for me. It also says in patience we will be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.

My coworker on the other hand likes the word endure.

I have been thinking since this morning about how she was drawn to the word "endurance" and I was drawn to "patience". It just shows how the Spirit can touch us in different ways and speak to our souls. God is defiantly mindful of us in a very individual way.

So I just spend some time looking at endurance vs. patience. In the dictionary both are nouns. Endurance is- the act or power of enduring an unpleasant or difficult process or situation without giving in; the capacity of something to last or withstand wear or tear. The topical guide in the bible says to also look up adversity, obedience, perseverance or steadfastness.

Patience is the capacity to accept or tolerate, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset. It has a Latin root meaning "suffering". The topical guide says to see also affliction or forbearance. Forbearance is patient self control, restraint, tolerance, or abstinence.

I think of enduring as something we actively do or bear. He have to keep doing it until the end reward is met. I think patience is restraining from doing something else and above all else waiting. We can endure well, endure patiently, or not endure at all.

I'll end this with some scriptures I found and really enjoyed.


Matt. 10:22- "he that endureth to the end shall be saved"

Mark 4:17- no root in themselves can only endure for a time when affliction or persecution arise.

John 6:27- "meat which endureth unto everlasting life, which the Son of man shall give unto you".

2 Tim 4:5- watch thou in all things, endure afflictions

2 Tim 4:7-8- I have fought the good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith...there is a laid up for me a crown of righteousness.

D&C 101:35-38- "And all they who suffer persecution for my name, and endureth in faith, though they are called to lay down their lives for my sake, yet shall they partake of all this glory. wherefore fear not, even unto death; for in this world your joy is not full, but in me your joy is full...and seek the face of the Lord always, that in patience ye may possess your souls, and ye shall have eternal life".

Ps 37:7- rest in the Lord, and wait patiently

Luke 21:19- "In your patience possess ye your souls"- possess is GR for preserve, win mastery over

Romans 2:7- patient continuance in well doing

Alma 7:23-24- "And now I would that ye should be humble, and be submissive and gentle; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive. And see that ye have faith, hope, and charity, and then ye will always abound in good works."

Entering the world of Physical Therapy!

Yesterday was my orientation for the Physical Therapy Assistant program. I am very excited to get the next 2 years under way and see how much I will enjoy physical therapy. It was an eye opener of a day. I got to tour the two rooms that I will be spending much of my time till August, 2010. It made me realize that I really am going in to a medical profession. Who knew I'd end up here? Certainly not me! I signed a form saying I agree to be a human subject. This just means that in our labs we will all be practicing on each other. I even need to get a halter top so my shoulder and spine can be exposed for some labs. Guess this modest girl will need to go shopping! I also learned that in my second year of the program I will do 3 rounds of clinicals. This means that in the fall semester I will have class for 7 weeks, work for 6 weeks, then have class again for 7 more weeks. My clinicals will rotate between an in-patient unit, an out-patient unit, and a rehabilitation center. How cool is that?

I have a list of purchases I need to make. One of which is a blood pressure cuff and stethoscope. Man I wish I had paid better attention in physiology. We had a lab where we took blood pressure readings and I could never the thumping and whooshing sounds. Today I borrowed a kit from a guy at work, I'm determined to get this thing down before class!

I got my books yesterday. They all have titles like "Kinetic Anatomy", and "Guide to range of motion". One is an anatomy coloring book, I think I can handle that one.

We all know the story dad tells of how Tamara cried before Kindergarten because it was going to be hard. Then Tamara cried before 1st grade because it was going to be harder than kindergarten. Then Tamara cried before 2nd grade because it was going to be harder..and so on all the way through high school. Some of you (mom, dad, Shaleen...) even know that I did in fact cry the first week of my anatomy class (which I got an A in the end) last fall...well, I am bound determined not to start this semester out with tears. Who knows where this path is going to take me...what I do know is that I'm right where I need to be and I am excited to see what is around the corner.

Joining the rest of the world....time to get with it! Stay tuned world...