Aware of my singleness, BUT....

 I was very aware of my singleness this weekend...

Yesterday I went to a baby shower for a lifelong friend expecting baby number 3. I am thrilled for her. Her kids are like nieces to me. There were 4 of us who started out in middle school there together. Two are married, one is engaged, and then there is me. I'm not even dating anyone. I wasn't even slightly unhappy at the party. I had a great time. Just very aware that I'm the "single" one.

 Then last night I went to the Walnut Creek Ward Young Women Camp Fundraiser. It was a spaghetti dinner with dessert auction. I bought a plate of peanut butter cup cookies and inherited a caramel cheesecake that my mom bid on and paid for but didn't really want to take home. Again, I wasn't even slightly unhappy at the event. I sat myself next to a family with 4 cute kiddos and learned all about underwater creatures.  Although not unhappy, very aware that I was the single one in the bunch.

Then there was today. I had an interesting experience happen at church.

The teacher was talking about the importance of doing family history and temple work for our ancestors. She said everyone should be involved with as much work related to the temple as they can. She said of course there are exceptions, for example- "Tamara, you are single, so it's not like you can have your sealing ordinance done." That's right, she "singled" me out. Without missing a beat I said, "I know, and even tried on the new family search to click on 'find a spouse' and nothing happened." I didn't expect that the whole room would burst out laughing so hard. Afterwards a friend came up to me and said her heart when out to me when I was pointed out as single and unable to participate in all the temple ordinances, but when I followed up with my comment she was like- oh yeah, Tamara has got this, and handled it gracefully. Until my friend pointed it out, I hadn't realized just how awkward of a comment that was for the teacher to make. Guess I was lost in thought.

After church I took the cheese cake my mom gave me to a family in my ward. The S family has 5 cute kiddos. I have never been to their home, and I can't even tell you their kids names. I just saw them in sacrament meeting today and decided to take it to them.  They were quite surprised and it was fun to do. I don't say this to toot my own horn or brag, most service opportunities should be private. When I walked back to my car I started crying. I thought, "Heavenly Father, that is what I want. That is exactly what I want. I want to have my own cute, drive you crazy, ultra busy, messy face, kid in a superwoman costume, smiley, happy little family." 

I was more aware of my singleness this weekend then I have been in awhile.

BUT, I am not in the least unhappy with my life.

I ate creamy jalapeno and watched Indiana Jones on my new TV with friend. I worked out with one of my besties. I watched my "niece" throw her mom a surprise baby shower. I made a care package for a two friends who's poor hearts both got bruised recently.  I made homemade breadsticks and warm chocolate melting cake for a friend who just got a job promotion. I helped out another friend who desperately needed a neck massage. I got to watch "Hook" with my "nephew".

I am indeed Happy and Hopeful in 2013!

Let the happiness keep unfolding! I thank God for the richness that I call my life!