Power Part II, The Follow Up

In my previous post Power! I Want More!, I mentioned an article in the New York times that I commented on. This week I received the following email:

"Dear all,

Thank you so much for your heartfelt, memorable comments on our story. We were thrilled to hear from people with such a diverse set of viewpoints.

We were struck by the fairly broad agreement that the church could do more to use women's talents and make sure that single women do not feel left out, including from commenters who do not believe that women should have the priesthood. This is in line with what church officials told us about their desire to be inclusive.

So we're going to do a short follow up story on the question: what adjustments would you like the church to make when it comes to gender roles? 

If you're game, Laurie and I would love to hear from you today with answers to any or all following questions:

1) What sort of formal or informal changes would you like to see in women's roles in the church, from the worldwide to the local level? Please be as specific as you can. If you are in the majority of Mormons who do not want to see women ordained, you might have concrete suggestions re: education, non-priesthood tasks, new ways for women to contribute, etc.

2) Tell us a story of something going very right or very wrong in how a women was treated by the church. Either an instance of the kind of treatment you want to see changed or a story that you see as a positive example.

3) What should the church do to address the issue of single women? Meaning, the unmarried women who feel left out of a family-centric church and the worry that by age 40 there are more eligible women than men in the church.

We greatly prefer to use names, but if you need anonymity, just say so (but we still need to privately verify who you are.) If you are willing to be quoted by name, please include your age, city/state and occupation as well. Email is fine, or if you'd rather talk by phone, send your number. We aim to publish this soon so please get in touch quickly. 

 

Feel free to forward this message and thank you again for an enlightening, moving conversation.

Yours,

Jodi Kantor and Laurie Goodstein"

 

 

I responded to question 1 and 3. I then received another email with the follow up article.

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/03/07/us/from-mormon-women-a-flood-of-requests-and-questions-on-their-role-in-the-church.html?ref=us&_r=0 

 

Since this follow up article reflected nothing close to my own personal perspective and experience, or my response, and since I have a blog, I get to share my response to question 1 and 3 here! 

 

1.) I am of the majority of woman who does not want to see women ordained to the Priesthood. I believe that men and women were created with divinely different roles in this mortal existence. Although I am thrilled to see more fathers today, including my 23 year old brother, take a more active role in caring for and raising children, there is a unique ability that women have to nurture. I believe it is a God given gift. The Priesthood, or the authority to act in God's name is a role men have. All however are blessed by nurturing mothers, and all are blessed by the gift of God's power on the earth. That being said, I see no need for a formal change to the role of women in the church. Women in the church are already in presidencies from ward levels, stake levels, and as general officers in the church. Women teach classes and sit on councils. Women are assigned to be visiting teachers which means monthly visiting several other women and offering to provide temporal and spiritual assistance. The church has already given us the foundation to fully contribute to the well being of others. We should not be waiting for somebody to ask us to do something or give an assignment;when we are baptized we covenant to bear one another's burdens, mourn with those that mourn, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort. There are plenty out in the world and in our very own congregations who have some kind of burden that can be lifted. If a Mormon woman came to me and said she didn't feel needed or utilized, or equal to the men, then my response would be- Who have you served today and are you 100% devoted to your already given responsibilities? If you don't feel utilized, then start praying for personal revelation to know how to be a better instrument in the hands of God, He has plenty to give you to do!
3.) Single single single...I am keenly aware in every activity I attend, every meeting I participate in, and every other situation, I am single. I told a patient at work that I baked bread over the weekend and she responded- "So, no boyfriend yet huh?" So it's not just a Mormon thing! I'm not really sure how the church can better address the needs of single women. I guess I am unique, but I hope I am not a minority. I have not allowed my single status to define who I am as Mormon woman. I have young married friends, young single friends, old married friends, and old single friends. I offer to babysit frequently for married couples who just want to get away for the evening. I go to the park with moms and their kids so they can have adult conversation while their husbands are on business trips. It is a family-centric church because the whole plan of salvation is about living for eternity as social beings. The prophets and other leaders of the church are always very clear in General Conference and many other public addresses that righteous women are not going to be denied blessing in eternity if they do not marry in this life. I signed up to come to the earth to gain a mortal experience that will help me gain an eternal experience after I die. I signed up for the whole plan, and that includes having a companion for eternity, even if doesn't happen right now. I have studied the teachings of the prophets. I have found that I am told to go be as educated as I can be. I'm told to not settle for anything less then best. Yes, there are more and more single woman approaching age 40, but if I am living the already laid out foundation of doctrines and covenants, it is up to me and my faith how happy I will live my life as a single woman. Members of the church need to stop getting caught up in "Mormon culture" and pay more attention to doctrine. It's already there. The way to happiness single or married is already there. If woman are feeling left out is it not the fault of the church. It's time to take accountability for our happiness. The church is not here to hold our hands, this is a work of the saving of souls and bringing people to Jesus Christ. It is Christ's job to heal broken hearts and hurt feelings. The church is God's organization on earth to help us know where we can find Jesus, the Savior. 

I'd like to hear from you. 

Question 1: How has your role in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints helped you realize your responsibilities as a woman? How has it helped you become a better disciple of Christ? 

Question 2: Even if you are married now, you have spent some portion of your life as a single woman in the church. Did you feel like you were an "issue" that needed to be address? How did/does being single in a family-centric church effect your participation in the church and how did/does it effect your happiness?

Question 3: How does the knowledge that you can receive personal revelation bring you closer to our Heavenly Father? 

 

I'd like to follow up with "Power Part III"  with your answers next Sunday, March 16th, 2014, so leave a comment or send me a private Facebook message.