Saturday, July 1, 2017

Helpmeet


Random picture from my flower garden just because they are so cheery and pretty! 


I should have written this blog back in February, when it was fresh in my mind and I had a lot of thoughts to go with it. I went to a Women's Conference at church and our Stake President, President Kelley, gave a talk on what it means to be a helpmeet. He said the root of the Hebrew word in Genesis, "Azar", means a strength, or to succor. He concluded it was similar to being a savior. Eve was a strength to Adam, not simply someone to stand there and look helpful, a real strength, and equal, a protector. I remember talking to a friend afterwards who heard the talk very differently then I did. She felt it was hard as a single woman to hear a talk about how married woman are saviors in their families. 

I actually had a totally different perspective. President Kelley said in the Austin Texas Stake, 70% of the LDS households have no priesthood holders. He was speaking to the audience made up of those very households. A room full of woman made up of many who are single, widowed, divorced, and married, both happily or otherwise. I took that to be evidence that helpmeet is not just a title for those with “eternal companions” but for every woman. I felt that the focus of the talk was on what it means for a woman to fulfill her divine role as a savior, not just what the role of a wife is.

 Being a helpmeet is a quality that all women, married or single, can have. I see all around me women who rescue and sacrifice, and provide strength for  those all around them.  At first I started to write down in my notes- “pray that I can be a helpmeet and find my equal companion” and almost instantly the Spirit whispered, you already are a helpmeet. That is where I spent the rest of the meeting in my thoughts.  How am I a helpmeet? Who around me exemplifies this quality? Eve was created as a helpmeet, and as a woman, my inheritance is to wear the crown of being a helpmeet. In my immediate family, my extended family, in my ward family, and in my association with friends, I can be a savior, a rescuer, and a strength. It is by divine design. President Kelley's encouragement was to go magnify this quality in our homes, our wards, and community. 

My mother is an example to me of a helpmeet. She sends out a weekly email to her entire family journaling her week. It's not the details of her week that is important, it is the act of trying to keep us all connected. She is a savior. She adds strength to the family by her love and encouragement. She sends out birthday cards to over 80 family members each year. She keeps in touch with her parents, siblings,nieces, and nephews, and several still call her for advice when they are having a bad day. She has been a strength and a savior in my life too. Just recently I locked my keys in my car outside a patient's home. I was 40 minutes away from her work. She left work early, drove to meet me, only to discover that her supply of extra key copies didn't actually include a key to my car. After calling roadside assistance and being told it would be an hour and fifteen minute wait, my mother offered to sit in the shade while I took her car to go see one final patient for the day, and waited for the Roadside guy. Luckily she was rewarded with only a 20 minute wait before the guy showed up. 
Never-the-less, mom saved me that day.  

Christmas 1981

2014 Trip to Salvador Brazil

My new house 2016

Squatting homemade chocolate chip cookies 

Her recent trip to Scotland, she makes the best poses! 

My gym buddy after all these years! 

Love hanging out together. 



Some other excellent examples of helpmeets in my life are every single one of the women in this photo. 



They work with me in the Primary (children's ministry) at church.  Every Sunday is a marathon. I always feel like I "just barely survived", but these woman thrive in the chaos and never skip a beat!  The schedules they keep with work, and school, and their families never ceases to amazing me. 





And finally there is this woman, she is an example of a helpmeet,  specifically to her husband and to her children.  



She recently researched healthy smoothies and makes them for her husband who is trying to change his eating habits. He is a rock star on his own as he gets up in the pre-light hours and studies for CPA exams, and she is his equal opposite and helpmeet. She is an example of a helpmeet savior because she so lovingly takes her role as a mother as a serious call to teach, to create memories, and provide experiences. She makes being a mom of a type one diabetic look effortless, although I know it takes fortitude and strength. 





I'm so grateful for my new perspective on helpmeet, viewing it in light of a divine call to surround, protect, aid, help, succor, and save. And I'm grateful to the women who exemplify it in my life, not just by their role as a wife, but by their role as women. 





Here is a blog I found backing up the definition of the root of the word azar: 

https://godswordtowomen.org/help.htm

HELP
Strong's # 5828 (Hebrew = ezer) aid: -- help
Strong's Root = # 5826 (Hebrew = azar)  azar = prime root: to surround, ie, protect or aid: help, succour

Gesenius adds that the primary idea lies in girding, surrounding, hence defending
MEET
(Hebrew = kenegdo) corresponding to, counterpart to, equal to matching
The traditional teaching for the woman as help (meet) is that of assistant or helper subservient to the one being helped. This definition would appear to line up with Strong's definition of the word. However, if you look at the context of every other use of the word ezer in the scripture, you will see that ezer refers to either God or military allies. In all other cases the one giving the help is superior to the one receiving the help. Adding kenegdo (meet) modifies the meaning to that of equal rather than superior status. Scripture is so awesome. God says just what He means.

Dr. Susan Hyatt gives the following definition from her book In the Spirit We're Equal "Re: Hebrew ezer kenegdo. In Genesis 2:18, the word "helpmeet" does not occur. The Hebrew expression ezer kenegdo appears, meaning "one who is the same as the other and who surrounds, protects, aids, helps, supports." There is no indication of inferiority or of a secondary position in an hierarchical separation of the male and female "spheres" of responsibility, authority, or social position.

The word ezer is used twice in the Old Testament to refer to the female and 14 times to refer to God. For example, in the Psalms when David says, "The Lord is my Helper," he uses the word ezer."

LOVE!




I've been a "Tia" and a "Khala" for years. I love all the children who call me such very much. 
 These two kiddos call me Aunt Tamara (usually just Tamara and I'm just fine with that) and are mine, all mine, by blood.  
I cannot explain what the difference is, but my heart just bursts with joy when I see them, FaceTime them, and get voice recordings from them. They bring me so much happiness. Here are some of my most favorite recent photos. 


















Thursday, June 1, 2017

Creation







I've been thinking about the topic of Creation a lot lately. When people ask me how I'm doing, I frequently respond that I am loving my yard. It may sound boring, but I am really loving being a homeowner right now. I love to walk outside my front patio and admire my pretty plants. I think it is more then admiration for beauty, but a joy that comes from being part of creation. I heard a talk titled "Happiness, Your Heritage" by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf at a General Woman's broadcast in September of 2008. Here are a few quotes from it that sum it up quite nicely. 


"The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul. No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before."
"Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty—"
Homemade Three Berry Pie for Easter
 In April finished the third season of the great British baking show and decided to try a rough puff pastry. After three hours of work my yield was very small because that dough is impossible to work with. My instant reaction was complete disappointment. But once I was  eating it I could imagine Mary Berry telling me that the combination of goat cheese and fig jam is spot on and quite delicious, and the pastry has an even bake. But I bet Paul Hollywood would tell me that the lemon-thyme meatball empanadas were ugly and not identical. Here is to trying something new even if I kind of failed. 
Homemade Coconut Cream Pie

"Isn’t it remarkable to think that your very spirits are fashioned by an endlessly creative and eternally compassionate God? Think about it—your spirit body is a masterpiece, created with a beauty, function, and capacity beyond imagination.
This started out as a 3-4 inch piece given to me by a patient. Not sure what kind it is, but it is suppose to blossom eventually. Still waiting on that. 
transplanted from dad's yard
"But to what end were we created? We were created with the express purpose and potential of experiencing a fulness of joy. Our birthright—and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth—is to seek and experience eternal happiness. One of the ways we find this is by creating things."

Jalapeno plant stripped by rodents! but once the rodents were taken care of, it has grown back. 
Mostly the bugs and birds get the strawberries, but I still like it. 
Spaghetti Squash....
...and it's growing like crazy! 
"If you are a mother, you participate with God in His work of creation—not only by providing physical bodies for your children but also by teaching and nurturing them. If you are not a mother now, the creative talents you develop will prepare you for that day, in this life or the next."
"The bounds of creativity extend far beyond the limits of a canvas or a sheet of paper and do not require a brush, a pen, or the keys of a piano. Creation means bringing into existence something that did not exist before—colorful gardens, harmonious homes, family memories, flowing laughter."

"President Brigham Young spoke to the Saints of his day. “There is a great work for the Saints to do,” he said. “Progress, and improve upon and make beautiful everything around you. Cultivate the earth, and cultivate your minds. Build cities, adorn your habitations, make gardens, orchards, and vineyards, and render the earth so pleasant that when you look upon your labors you may do so with pleasure, and that angels may delight to come and visit your beautiful locations. In the mean time continually seek to adorn your minds with all the graces of the Spirit of Christ.”
Got this at my house warming, still alive and growing new flowers every few months. "Anthuriums"
Also a house warming present. So glad the fern decided to come back after winter. 

"The more you trust and rely upon the Spirit, the greater your capacity to create. That is your opportunity in this life and your destiny in the life to come. Sisters, trust and rely on the Spirit. As you take the normal opportunities of your daily life and create something of beauty and helpfulness, you improve not only the world around you but also the world within you."









And sometimes you find joy in enjoying other creations... 




Sunday, April 2, 2017

I guess you can say I'm a runner now

Somewhere in January I decided I wanted to run a half marathon. The most I had comfortably run at that point was 5-6 miles. I decided to do a 10K first, and keep training for a Half. I ran the Chattahoochee Trail 10K in Atlanta, GA on March 4th, 2017. I mixed that race with visiting my good friends the Elizondo's.  It was 32 degrees when the race started and I hadn't prepared for that. I had one super thin long sleeve shirt and two t-shirts on. I was so cold, but by mile number 2 I didn't notice my hands being frozen anymore. The last mile was downhill. Running downhill after about an hour of running was exhilarating. I mean talk about feeling like Super Woman! Dear Virginia was there to capture the moment and cheer me in. Then her fantastic husband had a delicious brunch ready when we returned, I'll never forget: edamame spaghetti noodles, vegan sausage, and spaghetti sauce with sauteed squash and zucchini. The Elizondo's are some of my most favorite people. 
It was a fabulous stop on my running adventure. 

Pre-Race 
Happiest runner you'll ever see. (blue headband, purple shirt)







Next stop... 1/2 marathon. 

In my training I rewarded my first 8 mile run with the most amazing Torchy's Taco- the Roscoe. a crispy waffle, a fried egg, fried chicken, a slice of bacon with syrup on a flour tortilla. 


I found a small race in San Antonio called the I Ran Marathon April Showers series. It is a weeks worth of races in a Greenbelt near 1604 and I-10. Friday afternoon my mom and I drove down and stayed in a hotel that literally backed up to the trail head and start of the race. 

On Saturday, April 1st, by 6:30am I was up! I had my “Stronger then the boys” shirt, my fancy running socks, my body glide to prevent chaffing, my “Absolutely Brilliant” headband, my play list, salt tablets, and Salted Caramel Gu.  I got all geared up and we headed to the trail head at 7:15am. Our prayers were answered. The night before their was a 50% chance of rain by the start of the race and an 80% chance by 10:00am. Miraculously and hour before the race the rain chances disappeared.  It was about 60 degrees, partly cloudy, and no rain!




We found out it was a really small race, with 5k, 10k, ½ and full marathon, all running the same race. One lady was organizing it from start to finish. My number was 238 (it was 823 at the Atlanta 10K I did in March) but there were nowhere near 238 people at that event. I guess more will show up to various races throughout the week. The course had me run a 1.55 mile route one way and then back, four times.



We started at 7:45am. I took my first Gu and I was off!

Since it was a public greenbelt, there were lots of others out running and biking. Mom went and had breakfast after I started, but then came out and walked the same trail as me for 4 miles. I am so glad that she was there. It was encouraging to pass her and know she would be there at the end.

My play list did it’s job in encouraging me. I tried to think of the person I identified it with each song, a fun memory of that person, and then pushed on.



Every 3 miles we were back where we started and I drank a couple small glasses of water, and swallowed a salt tablet. Every 45 minutes I ate a packet of Gu.  I went 6 miles before doing a little bit of run/walk. My breaks of walking never lasted more then a minute. After 10 miles I was pretty exhausted. Ten miles was the most I had ever done in a training run. I was all out of steam, but I knew I would finish. I knew I could walk a bit, and I never felt like I had to stop all together. My goal was to do it in less then 2.5 hours. My fastest mile was my first- 9:53, and my slowest was my 13th mile at 12:14. My pace stayed in the 11 minute range for the majority of my run. My final time: 2:26:52. Bam! I did it!  It felt so good.  I accomplished a great feat without feeling like it almost beat me!  It felt wonderful. 

At the end of the day when I got back home I discovered that my sweet sweet dad left me 13 roses. One rose for every mile. Now how did I get so lucky? 



This morning I feel pretty good. I am a bit wiped out, sore every where, but not that I can’t move. I am amazed at how great my knees have handled this, not bothering me at all today. I am so grateful for all the advice I got from runner friends, and for the encouragement that I could do this. I could do this! I did this!  I ran 13.1 miles in under 2.5 hours.  Now what? I am not sure. I have a stubborn 10 pounds gained post surgery that I need to get off to feel better about myself. I will work on that. I don’t play on training for a full marathon at this point, but I can definitely aim to do another half!